This is a damn boring game. It is of course based on the Watchman graphic novel and released to coincide with the film. The game is a scrolling beat em up where you can play as either Nite Owl or Rorshach.Saturday, 20 February 2010
Watchmen: The End is Nigh Pt 1 (X-Box Live Arcade Review)
This is a damn boring game. It is of course based on the Watchman graphic novel and released to coincide with the film. The game is a scrolling beat em up where you can play as either Nite Owl or Rorshach.Friday, 19 February 2010
Turning Point: Fall of Liberty (2008) - Action Videogame Review (X-Box 360)
I realise I have been doing nothing but videogame reviews for a while now. I will be doing some more real horror reviews quite soon. Turning Point is a terrible terrible game! I have that out my system, so on with the review.

The game features online multiplayer which a lot of the achievements are tied into, but the servers have been turned off due to no one at all playing the online aspect I would guess. I got this for £5, It is a fun game, just hideously broken, and will mess up any achievement completest dreams.SCORE:
Thursday, 18 February 2010
Resident Evil 5: Lost in Nightmares - Zombie Horror Videogame DLC Review (X-Box 360)
Lost in Nightmares is the first of two planned extra missions for Resident Evil 5. It is set in an entirely new location, featuring new enemies and characters.
SCORE:
Wednesday, 17 February 2010
X-Men Origins - Wolverine = My Review of the Game
I havn't seen the film this was based on, I do wanna see it. As such I don't know if it is a copy of the film, or original. The problem with Wolverine in films is that he is a man with giant claws, and yet as the films are made to appeal to kids he never does anything interesting with them. Thank god it's different here. 
Tuesday, 16 February 2010
Eat Lead: The Return of Matt Hazard - Action Video Game Review (X-Box 360)
Eat Lead: The Return of Matt Hazard is a comedy action game which derives most of its humour from games, and the conventions around them. Some of the humour is spot on, but can also not be as funny as it would like to think.
Monday, 15 February 2010
The Wolfman (2010) - Horror Film Review
First of all, the cinema I saw this in was the hottest cinema ever, the heating was on full blast, and it was packed with people, there were literally people bursting into flames. As a result I could not wait for the film to end, so that might be reflected in my thoughts of it.
Sunday, 14 February 2010
Bioshock 2 (2010) - Horror Videogame Review (X-Box 360)
Have not done a post in quite a bit, so apologies I guess. As I have said in my last post, I love Bioshock. Bioshock 2 is the sequel that no one asked for. The first game was such a complete experience that it was generally accepted that any further games would dilute the fresh feel and even potentially destroy the feeling of Rapture.
Tuesday, 9 February 2010
Bioshock (2007) - Horror Videogame Review (X-Box 360)
Someone I work with who is more into games than the average person, but still quite casual was recently faced with the prospect of getting either Bioshock or Fracture. He chose Fracture, I was astounded. Speaking to him about his decision he said it was because he thought Bioshock was a kids game based on the fact that the 'Little Sisters' are children. Needless to say I executed him for crimes against reason.
I have recently been playing back through Bioshock in readiness for Bioshock 2. It is still a fantastic game, just as good as it always was. What still amazes me is what a real location Rapture feels like. The places you visit are jammed with small details, and the voice recordings really create a sense of what pre madness life was like. With water everywhere it is impossible to forget that Rapture is an underwater City, wondrous.
In the game you play as a survivor of a plane that has crashed into the sea. You head towards a mysterious Tower you spot. Inside you discover a Bathysphere. Climbing inside it starts to descend, an automatic message from a man called Andrew Ryan plays informing you that you are heading to Rapture; a secret underwater city where he and others headed to escape the confines of world society. Arriving in Rapture you see that the whole place has gone to ruins, roving 'Splicers' (people turned psychotically violent due to messing with their genetic code) lurk everywhere. A man called Atlas contacts you by radio and tells you if you help him and his family escape Rapture then you can also go with him. The ruler of Rapture - Andrew Ryan on the other hand is convinced you are a CIA or Russian agent sent to infiltrate the city and take its secrets, and so unleashes his Splicer army after you.
The game of course is a first person shooter (FPS) with RPG elements. Your weapons are split into two types - conventional guns, and plasmids. Conventional guns such as shotguns and machine guns can hold many different ammo types (such as anti-personnel and armour piercing). Plasmids are the games 'magic' these are genetic changing perks that give you a variety of abilities, everything from firing fire, electricity and ice out of your hand to gaining telekinesis and controlling enemies. The plasmids in particular give you a variety of ways to defeat the mutant enemies. For instance you can set an enemy on fire causing him to leap into the nearest pool of water to extinguish the flames, then electrocute the water frying him, or turn an enemy into a block of ice, and then smash him to pieces with your wrench.
The enemies are well realised, they are the former citizens of Rapture, now insane, they constantly speak babble, revealing hints of who they used to be and what they have lost as they do so. The best enemies and the most iconic are the 'Big Daddy's'. These are huge monster type giants in bulky diving suits, armed with a giant drill, or grenade launcher. They protect the 'Little Sisters' (possessed girls who harvest ADAM from corpses; ADAM being the highly addictive drug used for splicing). Until you actually bother them they are neutral, but as soon as you disturb them they go insane. Incredibly powerful and damage resistant each one is a real challenge to defeat.
SCORE:
Sunday, 7 February 2010
Hitman - Action Film Review
I will start off by saying that this is one of the most faithful game to film movies I have seen, and also one of the best (admittedly that is not a hard thing). The director was obviously someone who had actually at least seen some game footage of Hitman.
Friday, 5 February 2010
Zombie Mania - Review of the X-Box Live Indie Game
There has been 3 zombie games released so far this week on the Indie game channel. This is not a review of one of them... Zombie Mania is basically a Pac Man clone. You are a woodcutter, in a medieval town. The aim of the game is to collect body parts while avoiding the zombies. Dotted around the levels are also Axe's (power pills) these give you the temporary ability to chop up zombies. Rather than the single screen of Pac Man the view is much more zoomed in, so that the level cannot be seen all at once. Each level is larger than the one before, the zombies become faster, and the body parts more numourous.
The game looks ok, it is nothing special, but is medieval style with dusty ground and European style house comprising the walls of the maze. A meloncoly piano track plays during the game, it is simple but effective. The groans of the zombies are constant, and sound cool.
It would have been useful to have a mini map so that you can see where body parts of still waiting to be picked up. Also, the isometric houses that make up the maze sometimes obscure the body parts making it annoying when you are randomly walking round the maze hoping to find one last body part hidden by a building. The game is quite hard, and unvaried, but is worth playing if your into zombies.
Thursday, 4 February 2010
I MAED A GAM3 W1TH Z0MB1ES!!!1 - Zombie Videogame Review (X-Box Indie)
There has been another glut of zombie indie games released recently, this week alone there has been Samurai vs. Zombies, and Yet Another Zombie Defence Game. I thought a review of the most famous X-Box Live Indie Game was due.
IMAGWZ is a twin stick shooter, the game is of fixed length (around 6-8 minutes?) and lasts as long as the fabulous song does. The song is the most talked about factor of this game. It is a comedy song mostly describing the game and about how the game was made. It is linked heavily to the action on screen, e.g.: fast bits of the song result in heavier action on screen. Lyrics from the song flash on the floor. The game is played from an overhead perspective, your character is a man armed with many weapons.
Zombies are the main enemy type. They come in 3 different variants - Normal Zombies, Shirted Zombies, and Fat Zombies and just swarm towards you as they come onto screen. There are quite a few other enemy types as well. Green balls of slime split into smaller ones when shot, pixelated faces move round the screen, and abstract diamonds and clouds also figure heavily. To combat these are many different weapon types to collect. These include Rocket Launchers, Flame Throwers, and Laser Rifles among others.
The game is fun, and addictive, and for 80 MS you really have no excuse not to buy this.
SCORE:
Wednesday, 3 February 2010
The Road (2009) - Horror Film Review
So I saw The Road last night. Yet another post apocalyptic film (strange that two have been released at the same time; this and The Book of Eli). I had no idea what this film was about, or even what age rating it was, I saw it based on the fact it was post apocalyptic.
A man and his 10 year old son are travelling south in the USA. They are travelling south as the world is getting colder, and it is warmer south. That is the basic story of the film. Along their journey they encounter roving bands of cannibals and thugs, as well as other innocents. The apocalypse in this film seems to be one of a new ice age, rather than the War of The Book of Eli. The world is getting colder, is plagued with constant earthquakes, everything is destroyed with most animals, plants and trees all dead. The version of the post apocalyptic world is far more in line with Fallout 3.
Water is a constant. It is constantly raining, houses are flooded, water is everywhere. I'm sure this is symbolism for something though I'm too stupid to figure it out. The film for the most part concentrates totally on the relationship between the father and son. The father sees his child as God and will do absolutly anything to protect him, even kill him. Coming from pre apocalypse the man has no hope, his son is the only reason he is alive. Through flash backs it is shown his wife commited suicide due to losing all hope, and that it was only due to the man that she didn't take her son with her. The film is very downbeat, the father is suspicious of everyone, even benign innocents he angrily confronts, always with the paranoid cry of "why are you following us?". His faith in everything is long gone, and he is powerless for the most part. Encountering a basement full of emaciated prisoners kept alive as a food source for cannibals he makes no attempt to save them, he and his son hide as a gang of bandits chase a woman and her child across a field, not even wincing when she's caught and her screams begin. The boy on the other hand has never known any other world than the Hell they are in, he still has hope, and faith in people.
There is a beautiful part in the film which nearly brought me to tears, can't remember who says it, but it's basically that the person who dreams horrid dreams has nothing to worry about, it is the person who dreams only of beautiful things that is in danger, as it shows they have lost all interest in their life (or some such thing). Many times during the film brightly lit, joyous flashbacks of the man and his wife back before the world ended are shown, and then abruptly ended when the man wakes up and it is revealed it was him dreaming. The contrast between heaven and hell is such a difference.
If I had one thing negative to say about the film it is that the ending is stupid, an unrealistic deus ex machina of an ending which felt out of place in contrast to the relative realism of the rest of the film. The film is quite uneventful, but this is purposeful, the man aims to avoid danger, and it is only by accident that he ever finds himself involved in events.
This and The Book of Eli could be set in the same universe as far as I can tell, apart from the obvious polar opposites of what the post apocalyptic world is. This even has a character called Eli in it (this time an old man, rather than Denzel Washington). Many references to God also litter this, though not so much as in The Book of Eli. The general theme being in this film that if there is a God he is either dead, or just no longer cares about humanity.
A film that makes you question the point of life, downbeat, depressing, with little hope, little action, and the insignificance of life on Earth.
SCORE:
Tuesday, 2 February 2010
House of 1000 Corpses - Horror Film Review
Last Saturday my Halloween 2 Remake DVD turned up, woop de la do, love it! The extras are sparse, include Bloopers, some cool alternate and deleted scenes, and not much else. But Rob Zombie is my fave director, love his stuff! Talking of him, I re watched his first feature film 'House of 1000 Corpses' the other day. The sequel 'The Devils Rejects' is loved by all, an absolute classic.




































