Hellraiser: Hellseeker (2002) - Horror Film Review

Directed by Rick Bota (Hellraiser: Hellworld, Hellraiser: Deader), Hellraiser: Hellseeker is the sixth film in the Hellraiser series, and one that brings back the character of Kirsty, last seen in Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth. Much like Hellraiser: Inferno, this one feels very much like it was an unrelated horror that then had the mythos of Pinhead and the lament configuration jammed into it (turns out that once again was actually the case!).

One day while out for a drive, Trevor (Dean Winters - John Wick) and his wife Kirsty (Ashley Laurence - Hellraiser, Hellbound: Hellraiser II) get into a car accident that results in their vehicle plunging into a river. While Trevor is able to escape, he is helpless to save his wife who seemingly drowns. Sometime later and Trevor is doing the best to get on with his life, it is difficult though as since the accident he has suffered crippling headaches, hallucinations, and amnesia about the time leading up to the crash. Adding more stress is the constant questioning from Detective Lange (William S. Taylor - Watchmen), who is convinced that Trevor knows more than he is letting on about the fate of Kirsty, whose body was missing from the submerged car when it was brought to the surface. Increasingly unable to tell reality from imagination, Trevor's world begins to slowly unravel, as memories long buried come back to the surface, giving the man a different story to what he had come to believe.

With the past few films in the series being only tangentially related to each other, it was cool to see this is kind of a sequel to the second film, I loved that the character of Kirsty was brought back. Short but sweet that turned out, as she is dead within the first few minutes of the ninety minute movie. Thankfully she still appears throughout the movie, both from the memories that Trevor slowly unlocks about his past, and also in hallucinations, and even in home videos that he had made. Trevor wasn't exactly a likeable protagonist, mainly for me due to how little he appeared to be mourning his wife. It isn't clear exactly how long after the prologue the movie takes place, but he walks around in mild annoyance and confusion, rather than a broken man. While he isn't an apparent straight bad guy, that the protagonist of Inferno certainly was, there was still a seedy vibe to the film, and a Silent Hill/Jacob's Ladder type feeling that permeated his journey. To be fair to this one, the story of a man suffering memory loss, led to some good moments, the eventual resolution initially wasn't too much of a shock twist, but it had some unexpected parts to it.

The relation to Hellraiser was again slight with this one, with some early 2000's CG credit sequence showing the iconic puzzle box I had some hopes, but it barely makes much of an appearance, nor do the cenobites. Doug Bradley (all previous Hellraiser films) reprises his legendary role as Pinhead, and he shines again here, but much like Inferno, the character barely makes an appearance, only being in a handful of scenes (less than five minutes of screentime). Nor do other cenobites really appear much, mainly it is Trevor spying a cenobite in the distance wearing a trenchcoat every now and again. One part of the story I did like was the hint that everything involving the puzzle box may have already occured before the film's start, with the slow reveals of Trevor's past drip feeding clues that suggest that everything scary Trevor is experiencing is due to having came into contact with the device.
There isn't much call for too many special effects, when they do feature some of them are pure awful early 2000's CG, such as when Trevor vomits up a large eel from his mouth, and when during a dream sequence Detective Lange grows an extra head (looks so artificial and cheesy!). It's a shame these effects were used there, as towards the end of the movie there is a great sequence that uses actual practical effects, and looks infinitely better as a result.

This may technically be a sequel to the second movie in the series, but the vibe made this feel like a companion piece to Inferno. Both took place in a grimy world where sinister things keep occuring, and both feature protagonists who at the very least are very unreliable characters to follow around. If Hellraiser, Office Space, Jacob's Ladder and Memento had a baby it may look something a little like this. I expected an utter trash fire, but truth be told, it wasn't bad, and I didn't feel bad for having taken the time to watch Hellraiser: Hellseeker.

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Bubba Ho-Tep (2002) - Horror Film Review

I was in need of a film to watch last night, I finally settled on Bubba Ho-Tep, having seen it once many years ago and remembering it as not being bad. The biggest draw for me for this film is the legend Bruce Campbell starring, that and it being directed by Don Coscarelli of Phantasm and Army of Darkness fame.

Campbell stars as Sebastian Haff; an elderly resident of The Shady Rest Retirement Home, someone who may or may not be the real Elvis Presley (his story being that in the 1970's he got sick of all the drugs, women, and fame and swapped his identity with an Elvis impersonator). The residents of the home are dying regularly, the staff put this down to old age but Haff and his friend; the senile Jack (who himself believes he is JFK despite being black) discover that the abnormal amount of deaths is in fact due to a cowboy mummy who turns up at night to feast on the helpless souls of the old and sick. With no one to believe them it is up to the two old men to defeat the monster.

Campbell is fantastic as Sebastian/Elvis, he gives a real believability and vulnerability to the character, getting around via a zimmer frame, slow and laborious movements. His character narrates the film giving insight into his character and really make you as the viewer feel for him with his lifetime of regrets and his perspective on the young staff and visitors. The flashbacks to him in the prime of his life are very well done. Being the narrator it is never quite clear if he in fact was the real King or if he just thinks he is which was a nice touch. Ossie Davis as Jack is also a great side kick, his senile moments making his actions sweet.

Bubba Ho-Tep starts off bad, and does have some aspects that I thought were a bit off. Sebastian/Elvis talks about his privates far too much via narration, that and some toilet humour really fell flat for me, thankfully when the film gets going this fades into the background. It is a slow paced film and this is perfect as being set in a retirement home the whole atmosphere is one of slowness. Early action scenes feature a huge scarab beetle which looks quite fake but it is the arrival of Ho-Tep itself where the film becomes interesting.

Bubba Ho-Tep's appearance as a mummy wearing cowboy clothes gives him a strange visual style, he has the ability to phase in and out of existence and gives no heed to the heroes due to their age. Ho-Tep is a lame bad guy in general terms as he is really not very powerful. The whole reason he is feeding off old people is due to being too weak to take on younger ones, so when the showdown finally commences it feels quite poignant in a way, a battle between the elderly  that no one else seems to care about. The mummy is quite immature and childish, an early bizarre clue to him being the cause of the dying old folks is some Egyptian graffiti scrawled on the wall of the visitors toilets, and when the mummy does talk his speech is translated as a slew of insults.

The soundtrack for Bubba Ho-Tep is mournful, and some genuine heart breaking moments occur with the frustrated old men powerless to stop the villain. This all leads up to a showdown that while light on action brings the film to a bittersweet end. Not the best review I have done, but there you go!

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Resident Evil (2002) - Zombie Horror Film Review

It seems strange that one of my favourite horror films of all time I have yet to review on my beloved blog. Saying that my other favourite horrors (Halloween, Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2, The Evil Dead, even Battle Royale) also have not been reviewed (when this was first written). Resident Evil is directed by Paul W.S Anderson and stars Milla Jovovich (The Fifth Element) as Alice; a woman in a red dress with no memory.

The film starts with an unknown person releasing a deadly virus into the labs of the Umbrella Corporation. The security computer (known as the 'Red Queen') reacts by sealing the labs and killing all the workers stationed there in a variety of fun and gruesome ways. Later on in a mansion a woman (Jovovich) wakes up naked in a shower with no memory of who she is. Wandering around the mansion she encounters first, a strange man snooping around, and then a commando team who literally burst into the place throwing smoke grenades and flash bangs everywhere in a display of over the top bravado.  The team leader; One reveals his team have been dispatched to the mansion as it is a secret entrance to the underground labs where everyone was killed at the films start. His team are to investigate what caused the A.I to go crazy and kill everyone. Soon (well over 40 minutes into the film) it is revealed the virus released was a zombie virus that has turned all the staff of the facility into brain dead flesh eating zombies. The team, and the hangers-on must now work together to escape the facility.

I love this film, really love it.  It has a awesome NIN sounding soundtrack by Marilyn Manson, plenty of action, and cool effects. Many people say the best part of the film is its iconic laser corridor of death in which most the films characters are killed off in violent slicings. This scene was later actually incorporated into the video game Resident Evil 4.  The film is very badly directed but this leads to its innate charm. Characters float from location to location, often travelling in between scenes, or a little map screen effect that charts their movement, so one second they can be in labs, then next scene a sewer etc.

The acting is fairly terrible but again this is a good thing, especially seeing the reference material the film was based on. Michelle Rodriquez is her usually bad girl self, full of angry scowls, and token grimaces, Jovovich is good as the action star, her abilities growing as her memory returns. A cool sequence where she takes on zombie dogs is always fun to watch. The scene where her memory comes back is always great, and the fantastic twist ending is by far the very best part of the film and worth the trip to get to.

The zombies are not that great, they sort of act as a collective so are always bunched together, no real threat.  The licker is a fun end of film boss even if it does look a bit naff with its low budget CG effects. This works as a Resident Evil film with many nods to it, whether it be musical cues, or game type effects.

I love Resident Evil, it is very entertaining, and well watchable, its flaws adding to the experience rather than detracting. The directors commentary is also very funny with Anderson, Jovovich, and Rodriquez making fun of the film as they comment on it. The best film of the series so far, and the only one which could be considered canon to the games.

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UPDATE: 29/03/2020:

I have recently rewatched this one again and it still stands up as a very enjoyable film. It is big dumb fun, and is really idiotic and stupid, but that is what makes it so damn good. The soundtrack is still fantastic, and that final shot of the film...wow!

Everything's Eventual (2002) by Stephen King - Horror Book Review

I have only recently started reading Stephen King so when I saw this collection of short stories of his in a charity shop I snapped it up.  Contained within Everything's Eventual are fourteen stories of what I hoped would be horror, terror, chills and shocks.

Perhaps not having read many Stephen King stories I had misled myself a bit, because here there is a collection of tales, but not all of them are horror, in fact quite a chunk are not. Starting off with Autopsy Room Four we have the classic story of someone who is assumed dead but is merely trapped in his own body, unable to alert anyone to his status, not particularly interesting. The Man in the Black Suit is the first real horror story of the book. A young boy going fishing encounters a strange and horrifying man; the devil in human form who gives chase; a panicked and chilling tale.

The next few tales are all non-horror with a story about a travelling salesman contemplating suicide in a remote motel room, a truly boring crime story about a member of a famous gang, and a real life horror story of an undercover reporter captured by a cruel dictatorship. After this comes a short story set in Stephen King's fantasy world of the Dark Tower. This was a good introduction to that world and has made me interested in reading more.

The book then returns to horror for much of the rest of the book, though a lot of the stories are all takes on well known stories. The Road Virus Heads North is about an evil painting, title story Everything's Eventual riffing on Scanners, and 1408 being a classic haunted house story that is by far the scariest of the stories here (I have the film of 1408 on my to watch pile so may soon see that). Apart from a clever Groundhog Day style story (That Feeling, You Can Only Say What It Is In French) that is it for great stories. Riding the Bullet may feature a zombie but it is still a bit lacking on scares. A notable exception, and perhaps the best story of the book is Lunch at the Gotham Cafe which is truly insane and features an amazingly well described character (an off-kilter waiter).

Each of the fourteen stories is either forwarded or concluded with King given an explanation for why or how he came up with the story, some of these are really interesting such as King saying the evil picture in his haunted picture story is actually owned by him in real life, and that his merely passing by a New York cafe and seeing a waiter and an arguing couple led to the crazed cafe tale being formed in his mind.

King is undeniably talented, it is a shame that I did not get what I expected though with many of the stories in Everything's Eventual here being good, but just not creepy enough for my taste, nothing that left goose bumps with me. Comparing him to H.P Lovecraft is unfair but that masters tales always left me with a feeling of utter dread, and tears in my eyes.

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BloodRayne (2002) - Horror Videogame Review (X-Box)

BloodRayne is a game with a real grindhouse premise to it. Basically you are a female vampire who fights Nazis and that's about it.

Rayne is a half vampire who works for a mysterious group known as the Brimstone Society. The game mostly takes place in 1938 where Rayne's latest mission is to take out the German Nazi high command, including a man known as Wulf who is seeking out the lost body parts of an ancient deity known as Belial in order to obtain ultimate power.

The game is a third person action one, you are equipped with blades strapped to your arms, as well as able to use weapons dropped by enemies. Being a vampire you have fangs, pretty much any enemy in the game you can fix yourself to and drain there blood recovering lost energy in the process. You can jump ridiculous heights, as well as use your vampire sense to go into bullet time, locate objectives, and later gain a sniper style scope ability. You are quite brutal to your foes with the addition of a 'Blood Rage' mode (that you get from fighting) you literally cleave Nazis into little pieces, so quite a bloody game.

For the most part BloodRayne takes place in two locations (as well as a cool opening level set in the swamp lands of Missouri).  The first location that roughly half the game occurs in is a giant Nazi base made up of many different areas such as mines, factories, living quarters and submarine pens. During your assault on the base loudspeakers bark out instructions, while a second assault occurs from an unexpected source. The second half of the game takes place in a remote ruined castle in Germany where a family of vampires live. Nazis are your main enemy and come in many different flavours including jet pack Nazis and zombie Nazis. Other enemies include plant based creatures as well as a host of vampires that resemble cats. There are plenty of bosses, mostly Nazi commanders, with the exception of the end boss these fights are not too hard.

BloodRayne is quite fun to play but there are some annoying platform sections that are not helped in the slightest by dreadful camera and invisible walls that impede your progress to an awful degree. It's also a very murky game, it can be quite hard to see in a lot of places especially outside in the castle levels, though on the plus side checkpoints are numerous.

Not a bad time to be had with BloodRayne, but quite dated in look now with some dodgy CGI cutscenes and has quite a predictable, boring story. Lots of blood, Nazis and vampires create an enjoyable experience if not a great one.

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Dog Soldiers (2002) - Horror Film Review

Not that keen on werewolves truth be told. I don't know why, I have just never found them particularly scary or interesting monsters. I'm the same with the films. Wolf Man was lame, An American Werewolf in London/Paris are ok, did not like The Howling or any of its sequels, and werewolves are my least favourite part of the Twilight saga. Dog Soldiers is a British horror film released in 2002.

A British army squadron is on a training mission in woodland up in Scotland against a special ops squad. During the mission they come across the special ops base camp and find nearly everyone dead, the victims seem to have been eaten by some sort of animal. Finding some survivors they head off to get help but soon come under attack by strange giant wolf type creatures. Bumping into a travelling zoologist they retreat to a desolate farmhouse where they must defend themselves against constant attack by what turns out to be werewolves, until morning comes and the moon passes.

The early trailers for this film were not good at all due to their misleading nature making the film seem like it was going to be a comedy. The film has humour in it, and intentional humour at that but for the most part the film is pure horror. The film is roughly split into two parts. The first part is set in deep woodland and has the characters discovering what is going on, the second half is very static and set in the under siege farmhouse. The parts go together well, and feels like a natural progression rather than a jarring mismatch.

There is a lot of black humour in this film, from a dog that repeatedly tries to eat an injured man's internal organs (hanging out of him) to a soldier throwing a stick and shouting at the werewolf to 'fetch'. The characters themselves are all 'blokes' so there is a lot of banter littered with swearing, manhood questioning, and football. As soldiers the cast come across as convincing and tough. The only bad character is the zoologist Megan (Emma Cleasby) whose character is a bit flat and just doesn't seem to have any depth to her.

The werewolves are all done via suits and animatronics. They don't look too great in motion being eight foot tall awkward looking and very unreal gangly things. It is best when they are lost in the darkness as light reveals the effects to not be that convincing. The werewolf transformation scenes are poor, being in general someone who is about to turn falling under a convenient object as a human, emerging as a fully turned werewolf; a bit lame.

The film has plenty of gore, lots and lots of the stuff as well as miscellaneous squelchy body parts which is always appreciated as well as some cool werewolf injuries such as a werewolf that gets a silver tap jammed in its head, a werewolf who spends most its time with a big sword sticking through its chest, and a werewolf that gets its hand/paw lopped off.

The plot is very basic, there are some twists and turns but nothing to get excited about. Special mention must go to the quite humorous ending shot of a newspaper. Dog Soldiers was a good British film, with decent acting and likable characters, it is just a shame that it is a werewolf film rather than a monster film, would have made it interesting to me.

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Alien Hominid (2002-07) - Sci-fi Video Game Review (X-Box 360)

Alien Hominid is a great cartoony looking run and gun game that is very funny, but also quite difficult. In the tradition of the Contra and Metal Slug games it is one hit kills, and with bullets flying around, dense numbers of enemies and tough bosses this happens quite a lot. It was made by the same people who did the excellent Castle Crashers, with the distinct look being very similar. 

You play as a yellow crazed alien, at the games start he crashes his UFO, before he can recover from his accident the F.B.I have captured the ship. The alien must run and gun his way to get back his UFO. The game is split into there 'worlds'. The first five levels see you in a city with the F.B.I, next you are in Russia fighting the Red Army, until finally you are at Area 51 fighting the U.S Army. The alien is armed with a laser which can be upgraded with limited power ups such as flame, ice, and laser rounds. Also the gun can be charged up to fire a powerful blast. Per life you also have five grenades to use.

The enemies are very varied, and each of the fifteen levels features unique features, mini bosses, and humour. Cartoony violence is paramount, enemies reacting in a Tom and Jerry style to the damage you inflict on them. The mini bosses and level bosses are really great, all are unique and fun to fight, from the hammer and sickle wielding red robot in Russia to crazy giant robot monsters all are great, and a challenge. Cool controllable vehicles such as tanks, robots, and even Yetis inject some variety in the levels, and are fun to ride.

Alien Hominid is very hard, but continues help, and you will definitely get to the end on easy, and probably normal mode. Feels a bit dated nowadays but is certainly inventive.

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Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem (2002) - Horror Video Game Review (Gamecube)

This was supposed to be the future of survival horror. Critically acclaimed at the time, and considered a cult classic now, Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem is unfortunately a mediocre game put on a pedestal due to the lack of competition in the genre at the time on the Gamecube. The story is heavily influenced by the works of Edgar Allan Poe, and more specifically the master of horror H P Lovecraft.

After her grandfather's mysterious and bloody death, his niece travels to his mansion at Roade Island to try and discover who was responsible. In a hidden room she discovers a book bound in human flesh; a tome of the dead. Her grandfather had a secret interest in the occult. Each chapter of the book tells the story of various people throughout time who have encountered the book. Each level of the game is based on one of these stories, being bookended each time with the girl in the present day exploring her relatives house. As such you get to play as over a dozen different characters throughout time. From a roman centurion in 54 BC, to an amazon dancer, a medieval monk, a World War II american soldier and many more. Each time period contains a self contained story, mostly ending tragically ala' H P Lovecraft tales.

The plot itself is the games strongest point, each individual story is very well told, the best one springing to mind being an ancestor of the present day girls who discovers a hidden horrific desolate city of a past civilisation. This really felt like a version of the excellent short story 'At the Mountains of Madness' (by H P Lovecraft).

The graphics are smooth, but very bland. Considering the amazing looking Resident Evil games later showing up on the Gamecube there is no excuse for the graphics being so plain. The game was advertised as being at least twenty hours long in some previews, yet even on my first play through I had it finished in under ten (not that length of game determines a games quality!) To get the true ending you have to play through the game three times, but to tell the truth, I just couldn't be bothered to do that.

Much was made of the games sanity meter. The longer you spend around enemies in the game (mostly comprising of zombies) the more your sanity meter runs down. The lower it goes the more crazy stuff starts happening. The camera starts to shake drunkenly, a message pops up on screen saying the Gamecube's memory card has become corrupted, the game freezes and lots more random insanity occurs. This aspect of the game is kinda cool! (also aped in Metal Gear Solid 2).

Despite playing in many different periods of time, only about four different locations are used, with minor changes used to differ the look. This leads to many parts of the game becoming stale as you traverse the same locations over and over again. The characters are only physically different, and virtually all control the same. The magic system is terrible! Some parts of the game require you use spells in specific places, it can be really hard to use them in the correct spot, and I literally spent thirty minutes at one part late in the game repeatedly failing to use a spell in exactly the right spot, and then having to wait an agonisingly long time for the magic meter to slowly recharge again.

Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem does have an ace story though, and is very cheap nowadays, so it is worth playing, if only for the story.

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