I am an appreciator of puns and play on words and so I thought Onlyfangs was a great name for a movie (I have a box full of elastic bands on my desk in my current job that I have written 'onlybands' on). This comedy horror, co-directed by Angelica De Alba and Paul Ragsdale (Murdercise) doesn't let its larger than life story get in the way of some genuine horror moments, and the humour also is dark enough that it doesn't detract from moments of horror.
Wes (Drew Marvick - Bridge of the Doomed, It Stains the Sands Red) is a video editor who in his spare time attempts to hunt monsters with his geeky friends, to no success. One evening, he happens to actually capture footage of a real vampire, though the footage is so bad that no one believes his claims. The vampire is part of a group of all female killers led by Scarlett (Nina Lanee Kent - Murdercise), who for decades have hunted and killed humans for their blood, mainly males. Not wanting their identity to get out, the group attack Wes and his friends, intending to kill all of them. With Wes however, they find someone who isn't afraid of them. Instead, he is overjoyed; his life long obsession with monsters being a real thing having finally been confirmed. With the vampires living in squalid conditions, Wes offers them a suggestion - rather than kill people for their blood, he suggests that with his help, they create an online platform where paying customers can request for the women to suck their blood. This would both make them rich, as well as stopping the needless killing of victims. This actually works, and soon Onlyfangs is a worldwide success, with the client's not suspecting the blood suckers are the real thing. However, it seems that Scarlett may have an ulterior motive for creating so many new vampires, and with their fame, enemies, such as conspiracy nut Ridley (Anthony lave To'omata - Murdercise) have emerged, determined to prove to the world the monsters they actually are.
It took me around thirty minutes before this film clicked for me. Before this, I found it cheesy and really not that entertaining, I was wondering how I was going to endure the two hour runtime. It really picked up when the titular idea came into play. That isn't to say it didn't occasionally feel bloated. There was a good chunk where the quality dipped when Onlyfangs is introduced, with a series of disparate scenes of vampires around the world sucking their clients blood. It didn't really gel with the idea that by exposing themselves, the vampires would attract the attention of the sinister master vampires. After this, it became more focussed, leading to some great moments underneath all the titillation.
Much like its real world similar namesake, this features plenty of scantily clad, and occasionally topless women. The film has a whole bunch of montages, with many of these being sexy videos of the vampires dancing erotically. I get this was for the vibe of the online platform, but it was undeniably also there to entertain, and featured a bit too much for my liking. There was a feeling of female empowerment, with the female characters all being strong willed and capable of defending themselves, but they also came across at times a bit like sex objects rather than characters in their own right. This didn't apply to the lead vampires, all of which had interesting personalities. I wouldn't go as far to say they were likeable, as they were definitely anti-heroes, at times killing innocent people. That goes for Wes too, mainly he was a decent character, but he had a bit of a pathetic streak to him where he would act like a child in front of his mother. Maybe my favourite character was the gangly super-geek Quentin (Shane Meyers). Initially he seemed to be in the film purely for his wild facial expressions, but his relationship with one of the main vampires was fun.
The humour was not as in your face as I expected, and was mild at best. It did work though, and led to some quietly humorous moments, such as the fourth wall breaking part where Wes announces the first of the many montage sequences. These montages had some stylish parts to them. The film is stylish when it wants to be, with a late film montage of the vampires going on a killing spree wonderfully shot and edited. There is plenty of blood to be found, of varying quality, but it all looked good to my eyes. The fangs of the vampires looked universally good as well, so that didn't detract in the slightest. Some later special effects seemed a bit lacking, but they just about worked. The music was also excellent. The film's score itself has some lovely eighties sounding synth work, while the actual songs chosen were also good, fitting the 'alternative' look and feel of the film well.
The story did its job, but it did feel a little dated with what it was referencing. Everything felt a bit early 2020's, with references to mask wearing, Covid jabs, and the crazy beliefs of MAGA type characters. That would have worked at the time, but with the dark downward trajectory that America appears to be in, in the real world, this all came across as a bit bittersweet to see. From an outsiders perspective, that once great country appears to be dying, so this felt like a relic from the recent past, rather than covering topics that are more relevant in the current time.
Onlyfangs was very well made, and had an enjoyable cast of almost loveable misfits. A bit too much of a focus on scantily clad females for my liking, but the horror moments worked, and the slightly meandering plot did have some strong moments, that made for a genuinely thrilling conclusion. Nearly great, this blood soaked fang filled adventure was a good bit of escapism that had plenty of effective moments, and a good amount of quality filmmaking.
SCORE:
No comments:
Post a Comment