Never Let Go (2024) - Horror Film Review

It was near when I stopped going to the cinema on a regular basis that I saw the trailer for horror film - Never Let Go. Directed by Alexandre Aja (Crawl, Horns) and written by KC Coughlin and Ryan Grassby, the film had an interesting premise, but also didn't do too much to not make it seem obvious where this was all heading.

Momma (Halle Berry - Catwoman, Gothika) lives in a remote and secluded woodland home with her young twin sons; Nolan (Percy Daggs IV) and Samuel (Anthony B. Jenkins - Stranger Things). As far as Momma is aware they are the last humans left alive, due to a demonic apocalypse that took place many years in the past - demons possessing  humanity and forcing them to kill their loved ones. Her parents had prepared for this calamity however, and had retreated to the woods where a special house was built, the very wood it was made up of was blessed to prevent the demons being able to enter it. By tying ropes to themselves (which in turn are tied to the foundations of the house), the three are able to venture out into the woods to scavenge for food and other supplies without the demons being able to touch them. After a harsh winter almost completely depletes their meagre supplies, the three begin to slowly starve. Nolan was already sceptical of his mother's claims of the outside world being so dangerous, and this event leads to him beginning to suspect more and more that her beliefs are wrong, and that they can't possibly be the only ones left alive.

A few years back I saw Shadows, that film had an extremely similar story of a mum and her two children living in a remote location believing the world had essentially ended (in that one it was believed that sunlight had became deadly). So similar was the feel that it took me a small while to get over the thought that I had already seen Never Let Go. If it hadn't been for that one, this would have felt more unique, but instead it goes through similar plot points, and the story plays out in much the same way. There was a tiny cast here, with mostly the three protagonists carrying the film forward. I admit to not having the best opinion of Berry, I think it comes from never having seen her in any decent films. At best was Gothika which was good, but not amazing.. Despite that I enjoyed her performance here. I was even more surprised that the two child actors were decent, they were enough that they could carry large chunks of the movie entirely on their young backs. I had expected Berry to be front and centre, but she is missing for large parts of the movie, especially in the film's second half. Nolan and Samuel may be twins but they are near polar opposites. Nolan is distrusting and suspicious of his mother's claims, while Samuel takes everything she says as gospel. From the start the film is set up to make it seem like Momma is crazy, after all, she is the only one out of the three who is able to see the possessed humans wandering the woods. There is a little effort to balance out this feeling, such as nightmare sequences the boys have, but by the last act it really seems clear as to the reality of their situation.

Set entirely in woodland this had charm to its look. I loved the design of the old house with its hand carved symbols and words everywhere. Such a dilapidated look to it that the place almost seemed like part of the woodland. The effects for the possessed humans were great, I especially liked the old woman with the forked tongue. These possessed could speak, but had the look of zombies to them, carrying the wounds that led to their original deaths. The soundtrack was passable but nothing special, with the exception of the old song that recurringly plays out on the family gramophone.

Never Let Go didn't blow me away, but it wasn't bad. I enjoyed it's story even if it was very familiar, and the acting was much better than it had any right to be. Not scary, and it was too obvious where this was going, but I never found myself clock watching at all during the 100 minute runtime. Never Let Go is currently streaming on Netflix, though is leaving the service on 13th October 2026.

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No More Room in Hell 2 (2024) - Horror Video Game Review (X-Box Series X)

It was a few years after the release of first person co-op survival horror game No More Room in Hell 2 before I even heard of the series. Inspired by the films of George Romero (Night of the Living Dead), the first game was based on a mod of the Valve Source Game Engine, releasing on PC in 2011. This sequel arrived a couple of years back, and had a bit of a frosty reception due to a multitude of bugs and a sparse amount of content. Since then, a lot of the issues have been resolved, with new maps releasing yearly. I brought myself and my best friend a copy, and along with another friend we played through the currently 6 objective based maps and 3 survival ones.

There isn't much story to be found here, other than the small titbits that play out over the radio during missions. The internet states the story involves a ancient frozen corpse found at a dig site, this corpse happened to have a lethal virus frozen with it, which when free swiftly spreads, causing a worldwide zombie apocalypse. It isn't entirely clear if this sequel is a reboot of the series, or if it takes place before or after the events of the first game. Playing as a randomly generated responder, you are taken to various areas along with 7 other responders, there you are tasked with completing tasks such as causing distractions so trapped survivors can escape, and finding intel to help understand the zombie hordes.

The first time me and my best friend played this we were blind drunk. Stumbling our way through the game's tutorial, we launched into a random map where it was utter chaos. We soon learned we had to play this one differently to others such as the fast zombie games Left4Dead. The undead here are slow moving and not as plentiful, but your ammo and healing items are much reduced. I only really appreciated that after unloading my gun into the first ghoul I saw and realising I was out of ammo! The slow moving zombies can smash down doors, barricades and break windows in their quest to get to you. Seemingly dead bodies might suddenly stand up to attack, while you might witness body bags unzipping from the inside as you pass them.
Each map takes place in a different location with a unique look to them. Along the way you explore a hospital complex, the centre of New York, an isolated community, a rural town, a remote power plant, a farmhouse, an industrial area and a lighthouse. Maps vary in size, with the survival maps being smaller contained areas, and the objective maps spanning from a solitary complex, to a massive open area out in the woods. Playing with people is more immersive than you might expect, proximity chat meaning that you can easily have a feeling of isolation if you don't stick together with your team, and a nice touch is that spawning into levels has you and your team mates all in different starting areas. You have access to 3 randomly generated characters at a time, needed as the game has permadeath. Unless you are playing on beginner difficulty, or take a specific item into the level with you, if you die that it is, you lose all that characters progress and have to start over.

Zombies are the only enemy type and unlike the first game, this time around there are no child undead. Occasionally you will encounter special zombie types, such as ones who leave a poisonous cloud upon death and running ones. These fit in with the more grounded vibe, so no giant mutants with crazy powers to be found here. Dotted around the levels are healing items such as bandages, med kits and revive syringes, but with a weight limit to what you can carry you can never have so much that you can relax. Also, take too much damage and your character can become infected. While infected there are audio hallucinations and screen obscuring effects such as flies and blood vessels, and if you don't constantly take a preventative serum, then you will eventually automatically die and become one of the walking dead. The slow moving enemies gives more of a chilled vibe to the game, at least on lower difficulties. You have time to group up and discuss tactics, while doors and windows can be barricaded to slow the progress of the enemies. Even on the survival maps there is a more laid back vibe. I had expected Call of Duty: Zombies levels of threat, but instead it is a horde mode where you must defend three different areas before then extracting. Extraction is a key part of the game, with your character having to get to and defend an extraction point at the climax of each mission. There are various melee weapons and guns in the levels to find. These range from baseball bats and hedge trimmers to pistols, shotguns, rifles and SMGs. There is a stamina that is used up when running and using melee weapons, and also drains when you either shove or kick the undead.
Even with all the bug fixes, I encountered a few on my beginner playthrough, nothing major, but was a tiny bit frustrating occasionally. Replay value is provided by not only a levelling system that grants your characters better abilities as they improve, but also randomised item locations, and even randomised objectives and extraction points.

So far (having only played through beginner mode and a few ill-fated attempts on nightmare difficulty), this has been a load of fun. The more methodical slow pace of the game feels refreshing, and with new maps and a solo mode coming next year, No More Room in Hell 2 is something I can see myself enjoying for a good while.

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Smile 2 (2024) - Horror Film Review

My intention last week was to put out a whole five days of blog posts, but the way I watched Parker Finn's (Smile, Laura Hasn't Slept) horror sequel Smile 2, meant that it was late Monday evening before I got to the end credits and so couldn't write up the review until this past weekend. I really loved the idea of Smile, but the film was ruined a bit for me by the trailers which showed near enough every scene of horror. I avoided trailers for Smile 2 when that came out, but did lead to me accidentally missing it at the cinema, only getting to see it once it hit streaming services, in this case, Netflix. To give the film the best chance possible, I intended to watch this at night once the sun had set. Being summer here in the UK, the sun didn't set until late enough that I only managed to get 20 minutes on my first attempt, before I was hit with tiredness and went bed. The next attempt the next day was a little better, but again sleep claimed me, this time with 40 minutes left of the 127 minute movie. Finally, on attempt three I finished this!
Smile was a film whose central idea appealed to me far more than the film itself, would that be the case for the sequel? Of course, some unavoidable spoilers for the first film here.

Smile 2 is a direct sequel, picking up six days after the end of the first film, with the sole surviving (though cursed) character meeting their bloody end at the hands of the Smile demon. Witnessing this end is small-time drug dealer Lewis (Lukas Gage - Deadcon, Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse), unknowingly cursed to die after a solid week of increasingly demented and twisted events. Now Lewis just so happens to have quite the famous customer. Skye Riley (Naomi Scott - Aladdin) is a world famous popstar who is on the brink of a huge comeback tour, returning to her career both after a serious car accident a year previously that killed her boyfriend, and her subsequently ending up in a rehab centre for drug addiction. Still suffering some long term effects of her crash, and unable to get anything for the pain the legal way, Skye relies on Lewis for pain killers. Needing some of those, she visits Lewis at his home, unluckily turning up on the last day of  his life. Skye now finds herself saddled with the curse, and with her under an enormous amount of pressure due to her tour beginning in a week's time, she initially puts down all the freaky occurrences to stress. Learning quite late what is actually going on with her, she is contacted by a stranger who states he has an idea how to end the Smile curse once and for all.

For the first third of this sequel I was feeling a little deflated, it felt like it was just going through the same motions again, rather than feeling too different. I slowly began to appreciate the differences, especially with the idea of using a world famous character as the protagonist for a curse film (there are enough of these type of films that it is pretty much its own horror sub-genre now). Someone who is unable to go out in public without being recognised, and who certainly can't be seen to be freaking out with so much riding on her comeback tour leads to a fresh dynamic. Mixed in with the traditional horror, is more relatable anxiety around public performances, which the side effects of her curse lead to some really awkward and uncomfortable scenes of her acting insane on stage in front of crowds of people, reacting to grotesque hallucinations that only she can see. These moments were hard to watch, not so much with the scares, but with the awkwardness of it all, I really wanted the ground to open up and swallow her at times!
A lot of the scenes of horror in the first half are Skye noticing creepily smiling people wherever she goes, something that the first film also did. This idea was expanded upon, especially with the amazing mid-film scene that had Skye's entire group of  background dancers, all grinning manically, silently and slowly hunting her around her dressing room, moving towards her as a single unit, but only moving whenever Skye is not looking their way - was a great scene!
Like the first film, again, the lead protagonist becomes someone unreliable for the viewer to follow. Both her and the viewers become unable to discern hallucination from reality, more subtly done I felt this time around so that entire sections of the film, and multiple side characters with pivotal roles are suggested to not have actually existed. The destruction of Skye's surface level perfect life unfolds in a Black Mirror type of way, most feeling similar to season 3 episode 'Nosedive', though without the comedy that one had. There is a sense of horror from the popstar irreversibly ruining her life as she struggles with the curse.

Violent deaths are the order of the day here again, with some brutal ones being shown fully on screen. A dementedly smiling Lewis bashing his face in with a large weight looked very gross, with him front and centre during the whole event. Special effects and make-up effects were amazing for these scenes, but when it comes to the Smile demon itself, I had a similar feel of it coming across as a bit artificial looking, having a cartoonish vibe. Not all the violence is shown on screen, with some kill scenes left to the imagination. Those ones work just as well, often due to the reactions of the on-screen character witnessing it.

Smile 2 was a good sequel whose use of a famous character as the lead made this stand apart from other films of this type. Her fame increased the isolation and terror the character faced, restricting her actions and increasing the pressure and stress beyond what a normal person would have had. Riley really is amazing in the lead role, and she was what made a lot of the film work so well. Despite that, this still feels to me like a greater idea on paper than execution. With the way this film inevitably ends (something that I guessed even before I had seen the movie), it opens up any third film to really do something different, so here's hoping.

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Lars Shrike Walks the Night (2024) - Sci-fi Film Review

Sci-fi is often a not too distant cousin to horror, so, the Gary Walkow (The Trouble With Dick) written and directed Lars Shrike Walks the Night seemed on paper like a good fit for this humble blog. I admit, more than anything, I was interested in this due to Kelsey Grammer (Frasier, Cheers) starring. This very low budget, indie arthouse thriller was far more slow paced than I had anticipated, full of philosophical musings rather than moments of action.

Lars (Grammer), suffering amnesia, finds himself wandering a strange desert. All he can remember is his name, and that he had recently escaped from a prison based on an alien prison planet. The man has the clothes on his back, and an A.I controlled rifle, which is rapidly losing power. Lars' journey sees him travel down a narrow ravine, which results in him somehow ending up in modern day California. In a library, Lars discovers that he may actually just be a character from a sci-fi novel, and decides to track down the author of the novel in order to try and discover the truth of who he actually is.

For the first ten to fifteen minutes, this looked like it would just be a very cheaply made sci-fi B-movie. I thought to myself that Grammer must have fallen on hard times to have agreed to star in this. Whether that is the case or not, this turned out to be a more intelligent film than first impressions had suggested. It is relatively early on when Lars finds himself on Earth, but much longer before he realises this fact. It was somewhat amusing looking at Earth technology through an alien lens. Taking the form of such moments as Lars believing homes to be prison cells, and being mystified when he attempts to use a PC.
The sci-fi plot soon transitions into a more arthouse look at what it means to be alive and having freewill. This becomes more a visual essay, and while light on action, there are some interesting ideas to be discovered here, but it is a slow paced film.

The majority of the movie has Lars on his own. There are a handful of side characters, but just the one felt like they were really integral to the story playing out. This isn't something that takes itself super seriously - the talking gun for example is patently ridiculous, while Lars continuing confusion when dealing with modern day Earth is always exaggerated. His wanderings through desert and later California is a lonely and isolating trek, his journey constantly narrated by David Clennon, who starred in the 1987 sci-fi movie tangential prequel; The Trouble With Dick. All the philosophical musings on the nature of man made for an interesting subject, but the story suffered as a result. It increasingly felt more abstract, culminating in an open ended finale, resolving this somewhat, without too much really happening.

Less a film and more a study into the nature of humanity, Lars Shrike Walks the Night soon loses its sci-fi disguise. Grammer was great in his unexpected role, but the slow pace and more artsy feel meant that while the dialogue might have had merit, what actually happens wasn't quite as exciting. Lars Shrike Walks the Night came to VOD on July 24th.

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New Year's Absolution (2024) - Horror Film Review

 

When I began watching the Nick Leisure (Last the Night) directed and Damion Stephens written New Year's Absolution, I assumed it was going to be a slasher. It didn't take too long to realise this falls into the smaller sub-genre of horror, I've clumsily named 'friends do an annual meet-up and end up tearing each other apart over one night of madness'. Indeed a smaller sub-genre, but one I have enjoyed in the past with movies such as The Invitation, and other such ones that annoyingly I cannot recall the names of.

Ever since they were young, a group of friends have been meeting annually to celebrate the new year. Each year, ever since they have known each other, each of the friends have written an anonymous new year's resolution that is then picked at random out of a hat. These resolutions are treated super seriously, with the friends carrying them out even if it's to their own detriment. The meet-up is hosted at neurotic Damon's (Joel Brady - Men in Black 3) new modern house where he lives alongside wife, Claire (Shala White). His guests are surgeon Roy (Michael Copon - Night of the Demons) and his new girlfriend, Kira (Siddalle Diaz), work-out obsessed cop - Jacob (Josh Glimer) and wife Misty (Victorya Brandart - Birdemic 3: Sea Eagle), as well as stylishly gay Stuart (Rafael Siegel - Interview with the Vampire: The Vampire Chronicles; uncredited) and his boyfriend Travis (Lamondo Hill II).
The evening begins well for the friends, with them all happy to catch-up, but things turn sour when it comes time to pick their resolutions and one of the friends picks a resolution that simply says 'kill someone'. In anger at receiving this twisted resolution, the man storms out, and during an attempt to get him to stay, a gun is accidentally discharged and someone is shot. Rather than alert the authorities, the group decide to deal with this matter themselves, setting off a chain of events that see misery and ruin come to the majority of them, with past tensions combining with current problems to disastrous effect.

It was a good half an hour into this 85 minute film before the thrills and horror set in. I admit I was getting a bit impatient for anything of note to happen, but this first act did do a good job of introducing the cast of characters and their various personalities. I have seen films where it takes much longer before anything happens, so it wasn't the worst opening. With the next two acts being so darn hypnotic, I can stomach the slow start. There is effort made to make the constant escalation seem natural, and for the most part this works. I would say there was at least one incident that seemed out of character, just there to keep the story moving forwards.

I loved the foreshadowing on display here. One of these moments was a bit overplayed with constant references to it, but I did enjoy that each of the friend's resolutions do indeed come to pass, albeit, in the most darkly twisted ways possible. It gave the feeling that each of these resolutions came to be a fortune destined to happen in a monkey's paw type fashion. The interactions between the cast of eight were fluid and fun, giving the feeling of a puzzle slowly being pieced together. There was reliance on not just dialogue, but subtle physical moments to give an idea of the groups loyalties with each other.

With these eight characters, many of them I assumed would not survive the film. This was the case, and it became entertaining to see the various ways they are removed from the story. Each death scene is different, and range from the accidental to purposeful. Blood effects were great, with the blood looking really gloopy. The vibe initially had some dark humour to it, such as Damon being more concerned with blood getting on his new flooring than the fact people have died. As the story progresses, things get darker and more sinister, leading to an interesting conclusion.
This had a good soundtrack as well, including a montage sequence set to the classic New Year's Eve tune that everyone knows.

I like these types of film, and New Year's Absolution was a good example. Some parts became far-fetched, but almost like a Rube Goldberg machine, once the separate parts started to move, it was fascinating to see the plot play out. Scatena & Rosner Films' New Year's Absolution releases on July 14th on VOD and digital, including Amazon Prime Video, Fandango At Home, DISH Network, and DirecTV.

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Intrusive (2024) - Horror Film Review

I recently got contacted by filmmaker Eric Shapiro (Bango) to check out two of his horror films. The first of these I watched was Intrusive; an indie demonic possession film (directed and co-written by him) that while not without its issues, was still a very interesting film.

Sabina (Rhoda Jordan - Bango, Death Factory) arrives at the apartment block home of psychic Kelly (Sherill Quinn - Ted Bunny) for a session with the woman. Obviously afraid and desperate, Sabina tells the psychic that she hears the voice of a mysterious woman in her mind, and needs help to rid herself of this troubling issue. Under hypnosis, Sabina begins to exhibit psychotic tendencies, with Kelly suspecting the woman might be mentally ill rather than actually hearing an unknown voice. However, when she comes to speak to the voice within Sabina, Kelly begins to believe that something hauntingly authentic might be going on.

This felt like an even more indie bedfellow to stunning German demonic possession film, Luz. Both mainly take place in a singular location, both use hypnosis as a means to expose the hidden evil, and at 70 minutes long each, they even share the same length. For the first half of Intrusive, I felt this was going to be a really great movie. The first 35 minutes is one long drawn out scene between Kelly and Sabina/Phentara (the entity's name), with the former slowly realising that there is something supernatural happening. I was on the edge of my seat wandering where the story was going to go; the build-up with Sabina's anxiety created a lot of tension. I thought Quinn was great in her role as Kelly, a professional, but also having that professional mask slip at times to reveal the real Kelly.
At the halfway point, Intrusive changes to a setting I wasn't expecting, moving to a new character; Paul (Richard Caines - Bango), who is out in a park taking his baby for a walk in its pram. His story and the previous one overlap in fascinating ways, with it shown that both plotlines are occurring at the same time.

While the first half was single-room horror drama, the second half did something a bit different and in the process slightly trips over its own feet. In this second part, the protagonist is having a strange day, hearing voices wishing him harm that appear to be coming from the baby. This whole section came across as humorous rather than chilling, with bizarre event after bizarre event making for some comedic scenes. At one point as an example, the baby ends up clinging to a tree branch!, then there is Paul's panicked run scene that plays in slow motion like a running sequence from comedy action film Crank, and his constant falling over didn't help give the character any dignity. This part did add to the overall story, but the more light hearted vibe affected the unsettling first half. There was a fun cameo from the director in this segment that was nice to see.

This indie film didn't require fancy special effects or big set pieces to sell its paranormal events in a grounded setting. Like Luz, the intentions of the antagonist threat are relatively minor at this stage, making for an insular and intimate story with a small cast of characters. While not a great film, Intrusive was still a good film, it did interesting things with how the story was set-out (silly cliff-hanger ending aside), and the back and forth between the two tangentially related stories was well implemented. Intrusion can currently be viewed for free on TubiTV.

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Axes and Os (2024) - Horror Film Review

I very rarely watch horror films at night, not due to fear, but due to being cursed with not being a night owl in the slightest, much more of an early bird. I have been making an effort lately to watch horrors at the optimal time, and so Valentine's Day slasher - Axes and Os was seen after the sun had set to get the full experience. Written and directed by Trent Duncan (Icons of Horror 2), this for much of its runtime is a relatively by the numbers slasher. It does have some more unique and unexpected moments however. 

Olivia (Madison M. Bowman - Children of the Pines) is in a deep depression, not only because she dumped her slimy boyfriend for cheating on her, but because it is approaching Valentine's Day and she has no one to celebrate it with. To try and cheer her up, her loving cousin Leah (Cass Huckabay - Stupid Games), has arranged a special 'Galentine's Day' weekend trip for her and some of their shared friends. Leah is taking Olivia alongside nymphomaniac Dawn (Sara Wimmer - Metamorphosis), and sensible (though possibly alcoholic) Abby (Jamie Bernadette - Cold Blows the Wind, Ash and Bone), to stay at a house on Valentine Lake. Little do they realise that this is the hunting grounds for a deadly killer (Brandon Krum - Wolf Hollow), whose exploits have passed into local legend, and who only comes out to kill around Valentine's Day.

From the start, this all felt very familiar. Having recently watched comedy slasher New Fears Eve, I was in the mood to see a more traditional slasher, and so that was not an issue for me. I did feel this followed the formula a little too rigidly, with its cast of generic characters. Olivia was the most interesting one due to her misery, but to be fair, the other were not entirely bad either, only the promiscuous Dawn of the four main ones who I didn't care for.
Of course, it is all going to end with the girls being targeted by the killer, but this transition into total horror weirdly happened off screen. One moment two of the girls discover they may be in danger, then the next time the film goes to them, the killer has already broken into their house and is pursuing them. Would have been better to show that key point on film I felt.
Parts of the plot points felt a little shallow and convenient. Take the killer for instance, he's been operating in the area for countless years, enough that there is a local legend about the 'Ax Man'. Yet the authorities act like this is the first time they have decided to look into it. Their investigations are comically quick at identifying exactly who this killer is, and how they would be able to find him. I guess you can just put it down to the police being incompetent. More entertaining was a small subplot involving Olivia having nightmares, which suddenly gains massive importance with just ten minutes of film time left to go. This bonkers late film twist totally turns everything on its head, but was a bit too little too late. I'm not saying I didn't find this finale a load of fun to watch, but it did seem to come from nowhere, with only vague clues prior to the crazy reveal. It certainly made for a novel way to end what had been a straight forward slasher though!

Of course, in a film like this the kills need to look good, and these ones don't look bad at all, even if they are lacking a little in variation. Being called the Ax Man, unsurprisingly his weapon of choice are axes, but rather than the typical huge axe, he instead uses more modern, light weight ones, and often kills by throwing them at the victim. There is a decent sized body count, kills often accompanied by what appeared to be CG blood spurts. Having a lot of the victims being scantily clad (taking place around a popular resort) gave more of a feeling of vulnerability to the characters here, a neat touch.
The killer had a decent enough look to him; a kind of grizzled mountain man figure; long hair and beard, and wearing home made hunting camouflage. He doesn't wear a mask, and it was nice to see that rather than a mute homicidal brute, he actually had some intelligence to him and could speak should he so choose to. I will add that his backstory (shown via a flashback sequence) was nothing interesting.

Axes and Os (outside of those final ten minutes) didn't do much to surprise. As a 'switch your brain off' type of horror it served its purpose. This was entertaining, if not likely to leave too much of a lasting impression. The award winning Axes and Os is now streaming on Amazon Prime Video, Apple TV, Tubi, Screamify, and Relay.

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Garten of Banban VII (2024) - Horror Video Game Review

I have been barrelling through the Garten of Banban series of mascot horror video games these past weeks, mainly due to travelling to Australia for a month (at the time of typing). Hopefully I am still able to put up blog posts there using my laptop (I am!), this review is written four days before the long 25 hour plane journey starts. Garten of Banban VII is the first game in the series not to be released in 2023, and was the only one to be released in 2024. I also have to say it was mightily disappointing. As ever, unavoidable spoilers to follow.

After descending yet another elevator of the secret facility hidden under Banban's Kindergarten, you arrive on floor six - the domain of Syringeon. The previous floor having become overrun by Sir Dadadoo and his small army of corrupted creatures. You had fled the area with the intention of retrieving the missing piece of Queen Bouncila's magical sceptre; the only item capable of sending the giant slug and his naughty one minions back into her pouch. After finding the surgeon, he instructs you with locating Jumbo Josh, the green giant being somewhere in Syringeon's improbable city, and who the creature believes is the only one capable of stopping Dadadoo.

I have to say, I did not expect a city to be found on this particular floor of the facility. I reckon by now we must be getting on for a good half a mile under ground. After a brief but fun horror opening, you make it to the city. The rest of the game takes place in this small open world area, with you tasked with heading to various locations, such as a bar, apartment block and theatre, as you search for clues on Josh's whereabouts and find the items you need to capture him. Unfortunately, this is the most frustrating game in the series by far, frustration popped up at several annoying moments. Chase sequences are back, but there was one here that required a mix of running and pixel perfect jumps. I must have taken at least 50 increasingly angry attempts until I finally did that section. Then there is the drone, it has another upgrade that lets you control it directly. I had hoped this would make it less cumbersome to control, but alas, the controls are poor and its range is limited by invisible walls. There are also a lot less puzzles to be found here, a handful of ones that mostly revolve around memorising patterns.

The city was fine, populated by alien looking creatures who talk in a variety of languages, it wasn't anything exciting. It had a kind of 1920's American gangster type feel, the bar playing jazz music, and a misty vibe to the streets. I can't say I liked that aesthetic, for much of the two and a half to three hour game there was barely any horror to be found. You get the obligatory dream sequence which to be fair was pretty fun, but the lore here was minimal. The story of containing Sir Dadadoo started to feel like a bit of an unimportant sub plot, divorced from the bigger story of finding your missing child. I liked the twist ending, but other than that there wasn't many interesting events to be had, outside of an epic finale, and the death of a major character.

I figured that each subsequent game in the series would be better and more polished. Garten of Banban VII however felt a bit of a mess. It felt like it was too ambitious for its own good, the amount of times I encountered invisible walls during my playthrough was ridiculous, and those moments of absolute frustration really hampered my enjoyment. This was ok, but really lacked the quality of the last few games.

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Yes, I am a Vampire (2024) - by Stephen Kozeniewski - Horror Short Story Collection

In anticipation of getting a lot of reading done on a (so far) relaxing holiday to visit family in Australia I was sorting out my back log of shame. I have some books dating back to around 2014, including one from Stephen Kozeniewski (The Thing Under Your Bed) which to my embarrassment I noticed wasn't in a format that I'm able to use on my Kindle. It's a shame, as my favourite story in this short story collection (previously I would have called this an anthology but the author spells out the difference of that and collections here) is based in that book's world (that book being Braineater Jones) and it sounds like a grand world indeed. Anyway, Yes, I am a Vampire isn't quite as old as that book, receiving the eBook at the end of 2024. I guess that makes this quite a speedy turnaround!

Yes, I am a Vampire is a horror collection with a difference. From the title alone I imagined this to be an anthology collection of short vampire stories (doing my usual thing of barely skimming the synopsis of anything I am sent so as not to be spoiled on the contents). Not only is it the collected short works of Kozeniewski from 2013-2016, it is also half an autobiography. Each of the 12 short stories is followed by a lengthy afterword which not only talks about the inspiration for the story, but also goes into details of what was going on in the author's life at the time some of these were quite frank. For this review, I will follow a similar format, giving some unwanted and self indulgent background on where I was and what I was doing as I read these stories.

It all begins with microfiction piece 'Clockwork Offal', a one page story that at first went over my head, but each subsequent read it dawned on me more and more the horror being suggested. The afterword is where it became apparant that Kozeniewski really was dedicating half of this book on writing about his own trials and tribulations with getting his work published. He mentioned Braineater Jones here, and that sparked a memory that I thought I had a copy of this sitting in an email somewhere waiting to be read (as stated, I kind of did, but I hadn't bothered to check if it worked at the time). 

'The Thing Under The Bed' is next. I had previously reviewed the novella The Thing Under Your Bed, and almost skipped this one thinking it was just a repeat. Glad I did read this as it was a completely different and much shorter version of that neat story. Some of the awkwardly placed England references (this being set in London) are explained in the afterword, and it was there where Brian Keene's The Rising and City of the Dead is mentioned. I have fond memories of those two books, being some of the first zombie novels I ever read (the talking zombie lion at the zoo is forever burned into the undead appreciation part of my brain).

As may be apparent from this blog's name, zombies are by far my most favourite type of horror monster, so it was pleasing to see so many of the short stories here to feature the undead. The first of these was the crassly titled 'Exploding Sh*t Zombies' that as its title suggests, is one of the more grim zombie apocalypses. Many of the short stories in this collection are taken from the author's novels, this being one of those. I thought this story had a fun bait and switch at the start and was quite humourous. I was (very) indirectly mentioned in the notes for this one when Kozeniewski mentions sending his novel Braineater Jones off to a horde of various bloggers and reviewers back when it was first written.
This was the start of a bunch of undead tales, 'The New Dark Ages' was a bleak and grim one, starting off as a fantasy, before being revealed to actually be a Dungeons & Dragons game that a group of friends hiding out from an undead uprising were playing, before the rug pull of something far more twisted. The author in the notes mentions the cover for the anthology this one was originally published in was quite ugly. Having Googled the cover image; yup, it sure was a hideous cover!
'The Man With Four Scars' was a great story, a zombie story but one that takes place during caveman times. I have never read anything similar before, and having the story told from the perspective of a prehistoric human with his own way of talking and describing things was fascinating. I read this one in two parts, having crashed after drinking two strong cups of coffee in a row. The most exciting part of this somewhat haunting story picked up immediately from where I had paused reading, so I demolished this story upon getting back to it.

That brings me up to almost present day (at time of typing). The rest of the collection I read in the span of a day while out on holiday in Australia (where I will be until the end of March). I tried to read 'The Key to the Stars' back in the U.K while my best friend was staying at my house. I couldn't recall a word when I returned to it, so began again. I thought this was a charming story, and one of the most light hearted ones. A sci-fi story about a girl who encounters a holographic projection of an alien in the 1950's. It mixes this story with a real account of an alien encounter to wonderful effect. For me 'The Old Man and the Seesaw' was the highlight of this short story collection. Set in the Braineater Jones world, it is another that shows imagination, the titular 'old man' referring to a zombie fetus whose fortunate early immersion in an alcoholic based preserving formula led to it being one of the oldest surviving zombies in that alternate world where sentient undead have emerged who require alcohol to keep their faculties. The notes for this one particularly resonated to me, the authors hopes to one day be able to write full time and not need to have a bill paying day job echoing my desire to one day somehow be able to do the same, but with my blog.
The last zombie story follows with 'Cadaver Bite', showing an unusual form of execution used during a zombie outbreak. I was sat nearby a radio and got engrossed enough in this one that the words being spoken on the radio faded away to nothing for me.
This review is perhaps getting a bit self indulgent and lengthy so will zoom through the last four stories. 'The Quiet Life' is very similar to A Quiet Place, but as the notes afterwards say, this was actually written a few years before that film came out. The final three stories are all single page microfiction stories set around Christmas; 'Traditions', 'A Visit From...' and 'Brightly Shining' were all excellent and twisted in their own ways, a lovely finish to this collection.

I have always had a love of anthologies (well, in this case, collections), so with Yes, I am a Vampire I found yet another one that I enjoyed. Truthfully, there wasn't a short story I didn't like, but there were some that were in my mind much better written than others. I was of course also pleased that so many of these featured zombies, that is never going to be anything other than a positive thing in my mind. The autobiographical part was also very interesting. It challenged my baseless assumptions that all published authors are effortlessly able to get their stories out. 

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Are You There? (2024) - Horror Film Review

Are You There? is a supernatural horror film that was directed by Kim Noonan, which felt like a relic from a decade or so back. It has some unexpected twists along its initially slow paced story, and I think I liked the actor who played the protagonist, but there wasn't much real substance here.

Rosa (Laura Sollet - Apocalypse Rising: A Zombie Saga) is a paranormal psychologist student who believes that experiences of the paranormal comes from the mind, rather than be an actual thing. With her housemate, Natalie (Eva Meyerson - Boneyard), she makes online videos where she explores different ways to contact the dead. After her beloved grandma dies (someone who had classed themselves as a white witch), she leaves Rosa a box of her belongings. Included in the box is a special candle and candle holder, with instructions that tell her niece how to use the candle to contact her from beyond the grave. Rosa is very surprised when she tries it and it actually works, the candle flame blowing left or right in answer to her yes or no questions. At first, Rosa is overjoyed that she has finally gotten proof of the supernatural, but as more and more sinister things happen around her, she comes to believe she hasn't contacted her grandma through the candle, but an evil spirit who wishes her harm.

For the first 40 minutes of this roughly 90 minute horror I was pretty bored. There was not much of note happening at all, outside of the candle flame blowing left or right. I thought Rosa was fine as a protagonist, if a little dull, but the story itself was almost mind numbingly dull. Then a change happens, and the rest of the movie plays out as one long nightmare sequence of Rosa trapped in her house, experiencing all sorts of unnatural terror. These take the form of sequences where she has travelled through time or space to earlier places and people in her life, encounters that she in unable to tell if they are real or not, and all sorts of paranormal activity, such as things moving on their own, and a stubborn candle whose flame refuses to go out even if submerged in water! The transition from slow burn snore fest to wild madness was sudden, it almost felt like they were two different films clumsily taped together. The second half is a lot better, and action packed. The midpoint scene where Rosa encounters an intruder in her home was the highlight of Are You There?, a stark and brutal excursion into real life horror, before it settles back into mad paranoid craziness. The eventual reveal of what has actually been going on was unexpected, but also not original, I have seen the same plot device used in countless horrors over the years, specifically earlier this century when that idea seemed to be all the rage. It also makes the first 40 minutes not really make a lot of sense in hindsight, hence it feeling like two films in one.

The horror, when it eventually arrives isn't bad, aside from one terrible looking CG effect of a flame blowing up into a perpetual fireball, it was fine. You have the familiar nightmare things, such as rooms opening onto impossible locations, or a character abruptly being yanked to a different location. It all looks good, especially with the previously mentioned mid-film break into home invasion terror. 
The story looks into sensitive topics, I had no problem with that. Everything revolving around the candle was a bit silly. I especially liked when Rosa looks on the internet for help with her situation and finds comically dark results. For a way to contact the dead that has such harsh consequences be so easy to do was humorous, I will admit, the crazed live streaming she does where she tries to warn her followers was excellently done, Sollet always did a fine job of appearing near insane with fear at some of the supernatural events she encounters, with the obligatory 'madness dancing in the eyes' look that never gets old.

Are You There? was an average horror that was let down by some strange editing techniques. I'm still not even sure if the wild prologue sequence was actually a part of the film or some sort of trailer before the screener I watched - wild disparate images that made little sense. Not the worst film out there, but there didn't seem like much originality with the story being told, and that first half was a real slog to get through. Are You There? releases second quarter this year via High Fliers Films.

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The Killgrin (2024) - Horror Film Review

The effects of the sleeping pill I took the night before last has nearly faded now. That is good as it means I can pay proper attention to the films I am watching for review, without being in a dozy trance. The Killgrin is a by the numbers supernatural horror that was directed by Joanna Tsanis (Mourn). Don't quote me on this, but I think this may be a feature length version of her short film, Smile. The central idea of this horror reminded me a lot of the similarly titled Smile, but not done as well thanks to an uninspiring antagonist force and some goofy effects.

Miranda (Konstantina Mantelos - Smile, and a co-writer of this film) is not having a good time of it. First, her ex-boyfriend was such a big stalker that she had to have a restraining order put out against him, but now, her current boyfriend has committed suicide by leaping out their apartment window. She begins to look for answers for her misery, joining a therapy group, as well as looking more outside the box, such as heading to a fortune teller. It is at the later that she is told that she might be afflicted with a 'killgrin'; a supernatural entity that feeds off of suffering. Miranda doesn't pay that much heed, but as those afflicted with sadness start to die in horrifically similar ways around her, she begins to suspect there might be some shocking truth in the fortune teller's words.

This supernatural movie fitted all too comfortably into the horror sub-genre it was a part of. I had a constant feeling of déjá vu watching this, which wouldn't have been so bad if parts of this had been done better. My biggest bugbear was the design of the evil, and how it affected those it tormented. The design of the monster wasn't the best, it kind of looked like a guy in a monster suit, and brought to mind the deadite from the well at the start of Army of Darkness. I liked that it was constantly dripping teeth off its malformed body, but it didn't look great, nor did the CG heavy effects of it turning into black smoke. It didn't help that it is barely seen until the third act, the first two thirds all the viewer is treated to is the black smoke, perhaps a blessing when the reveal doesn't land very well. There was also an issue with the method of death. It forces its victims mouth into an inverted grin, eventually causing the jaw to dislocate and rip open. This leads to moments where the protagonist is in the clutches of this evil and has the most ridiculous silly effects to simulate this happening to her. It didn't look great it has to be said.

That was actually a shame, as the rest of the movie, while predictable and familiar, was not bad. I thought Mantelos was great in the lead role, special mention goes to alcoholic side character - Brian (Adam Tsekhman - One in Two People). I admit to thinking he might have been more evil than his innocent character appeared, but he brought light and sunshine to each scene he was in, and I personally loved the set design for his apartment. The less said about the sub plot of the two detectives investigating the strange deaths the better, I liked them, but it didn't make the horror seem any less stupid. An early death was awkwardly moved past by just not being mentioned, despite the outlandish way the victim died. Apparently a character randomly dying in their flat by their jaw being ripped off was just a 'tragic event' with no further insight than that! There were not really any bad characters to be found, no complaints with the casting choices, it was the story decisions that were at fault.

The best thing I can really say about The Killgrin is that at least it wasn't quite as bad as The Bye Bye Man. Similar in format, but with a better cast, this one had potential, it was at least neat for looking at the topic of depression and how that (literally here) can bring a dark cloud over you, but it didn't stick the landing, with an antagonist that looked more stupid than scary. When your main draw is such an ineffective creation, the movie just isn't able to function as an effective horror. The Killgrin releases in the second quarter this year thanks to High Fliers Films.

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Poppy Playtime: Chapter 3 'Deep Sleep' (2024) - Horror Video Game Review

I was pleasantly surprised when I decided to check out episodic horror game; Poppy Playtime late last year. I had expected something like Five Nights At Freddy's but more basic. Instead it was the opposite, feeling like that game if it had been expanded upon to be more than just a single room puzzler. Both Chapter 1 'A Tight Squeeze' and Chapter 2 'Fly in a Web' were quite light on genuine horror moments, I would even go as far to say they are relatively child friendly. That isn't the case for Poppy Playtime: Chapter 3 'Deep Sleep' - this chapter heightens the terror to make an experience that I would not recommend for those who don't enjoy horror. Of course, unavoidable spoilers for what has come before.

Chapter 2 ended with self aware doll Poppy Playtime deciding you were too useful to let go, and so at the last moment diverted the train that was transporting you to the surface, to instead send you deeper into the nightmarish facility, inadvertently causing the train to crash in the process. The third chapter begins with chapter antagonist - CatNap, picking up your unconscious body and discarding it in the trash compactor room. Regaining consciousness at the last moment, you escape the room, and soon get in contact with new character; Ollie, who communicates via a telephone device you collect. He tasks you with powering up a huge machine to divert the hallucinogenic red gas that is blocking the way deeper into the vast underground complex. To do this, you must head into Playcare - the giant biodome orphanage, that also happens to be the stalking ground of the lethal CatNap.

With each subsequent chapter being more expensive to buy, I really hoped the game would increase to match the price rise. That again is the case here, where Chapter 1 was around an hour long, and Chapter 2 around two hours in length, by the time the end credits for Chapter 3 appeared, I had been playing for around four hours. It is more of the same, you explore maze-like levels in first person, solving puzzles, while avoiding the chapter specific enemies who instant kill you should they get a hold of you. The game is at its most unique with the biodome setting, a vast area that is designed to look like it is outside, despite being very very deep below the surface. The central hub area here is made to look like a small town, with various buildings that you travel to as you attempt to reroute the power. Your adventure takes you to a variety of locations, from a school, to caverns, and offices. The horror is in abundance here, with much of it suggested rather than shown in detail. There was something really quite unsettling exploring dormitories and nurseries that featured blood stained bunk beds and cots.
To help assist you, as per previous chapters, new abilities for your grab-hand device are given. You get an upgraded grab-hand that lets you stretch out the hands further, and get two additional upgrades for it - one that allows you to use jump pads, and one that fires flares to light up dark areas. I spent much of my time here cursing how dark the game world was, especially when at the midway point your torch is destroyed. This was a problem of my own making, as I completely forgot I had a flare gun attachment that would have been very useful at giving light to the sometimes pitch black areas! The gun can also be used to protect against the pint-sized enemies that appear in the terrible Playhouse section. Terrible as in horror filled, not terrible as in badly made. Again, forgetting I had the flare gun made that part of the game a whole lot harder.

I was pleased that there is quite a lot of lore revealed during this chapter. You get information about the event that led to the initial disaster in the 90s (that you were seemingly the sole survivor of), and also get a good idea of your ultimate goal in the facility, with the hinted at main antagonist - 'The Prototype', making more of an appearance. The big bad of Chapter 2 was a constant presence, constantly interacting with you. CatNap has a far more hands off approach and barely even appears until the final half of the game. Puzzles were simple, but involved enough to feel satisfying to solve, mainly revolving around moving batteries about, and setting up relays to power up doors. The chapter culminates with a big boss battle, which was basically Five Nights At Freddy's, having you needing to monitor a series of corridors that something was trying to advance down. The hands-off approach of  the chapter antagonist was balanced with a few other enemies, a teacher robot that only moves on you when you aren't looking at it, and a horde of tiny robotic animals. These were both neat and effective enemies to face. Often these take the form of chase sequences. There were quite a few of these sections, though strangely, the checkpoints for these were never just before them, but several rooms before. This led to a pointless minute or so walk to get to the section that you previously died in each time (should you fail). Added to the horror mix are nightmare sequences (a result of the hallucinogenic red gas lingering around). These parts gave some variation, adding rather than detracting from the overall experience.

Each chapter of Poppy Playtime has both increased in length, and increased in horror. It was a pleasure to have the best looking area of the game yet with Poppy Playtime: Chapter 3 'Deep Sleep', and I appreciated how survival horror like this felt, even if you are only in actual danger during set events, rather than constantly. I loved the lore here. The dark locations, and not knowing where to go during chase sequences occasionally frustrated, but myself forgetting I had a flare gun was no doubt the cause of some of these frustrations. As I say at the end of each chapter review; I can't wait to pick up the next chapter and get further into the Hell of Playtime Co.

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